Believing Your Story
The other day I was sitting in the lodge at the mountain after snowboarding talking to a regular there name Jimmy. Jimmy is in his 60s and a retired steel worker. We were chatting a little bit about retirement and he said to me “If it wasn’t for being in a union all those years and the way they made me put money in to my pension I never would have been able to retire because I’m no good with money.”
I just nodded, but inside I was a little sad. Not because he put money away. That obviously worked out for him which is great. It was his story of being powerless when it came to his money and his future.
Anytime anyone uses disempowering language it breaks my heart a little. I used to think that the reason why I got in to medicine was because I wanted to help people. And that is true, but it’s not the whole thing. After years of working with patients as well as a lot of my own personal development work I realize that I’m not interested in fixing people. I’m much more drawn to empowering people by helping them realize that they are the root of their success. The most fulfilling patient cases were the ones who had dramatic positive shifts because they listened and implemented simple lifestyle changes that I suggested. I provided the guidance, but the rest was up to them. And they realized that they had more power over their own health than they could ever imagine.
Jimmy wasn’t incapable of handling his money. He had a story that he wasn’t capable and was in a circumstance that enabled his story by giving him permission to be hands-off with his money. How do I know this? Because he has been able to manage his money pretty well since retiring and skis every day.
Right now think about something that you believe is your circumstance. Or something that you have told yourself is your lot in life. Anything that you have determined is the reason for not doing something. There’s a good chance that whatever it is isn’t actually true and it’s a story you are telling yourself. The way that you can tell is by approaching it with curiosity and questioning it.
So what’s your story?