Are you in a marriage/committed relationship and financially self-sufficient?

If you are married or in a committed relationship where your partner is the “bread winner”, this is for you.

There are many practitioners in this field who own their clinics and are in a married/committed relationship with a financial dynamic where their partner makes the majority of the household income and pays all the personal bills.

I want to make it clear that there is nothing wrong with this dynamic at all and this is not a criticism of that arrangement. BUT it has come to my attention that there are many of you who don’t actually pay yourselves from the income earned by your clinics and you live entirely off of your partner’s income.

Again, there is nothing inherently wrong with this arrangement between you and your partner. If this works for you as a couple or family then more power to you. The concern for me lies in the strong possibility that this hands-off approach translates to you being in the dark about your finances. I have been asked by many people in our field “How do I know how much to pay myself?”. Which says to me that they aren’t actually sure how much money they need to earn in order to pay for their life and lifestyle. THIS IS A VERY DISEMPOWERED PLACE TO BE.

Here’s some real talk: Right now your relationship may be amazing, strong, and you’re madly in love, but this may change. 40% of marriages end in divorce. No one goes in to marriage expecting to get divorced and you never in a million years thought you will be part of that statistic, but shit happens. People grow and, unfortunately, not always together (trust me on this one). Even if you are together until the end… if you’re a woman married to a man statistically you will outlive your husband by many more years. And it is a very sad and common occurrence for widows to be completely blindsided by financial realities because their partner was the one who handled the money. 

I’m not saying that you need to start thinking like a catastrophist and start preparing for a breakup or death. And I’m DEFINITELY not suggesting that you should be creating your own secret “just in case” stash. In my opinion, partners shouldn’t be hiding money from each other. What I want is for you to not be ignorant about your money. I want you to have the knowledge and the tools to manage your money with confidence. I want you to not be in the dark about anything that affects your present and future. I want you to be in the know of how much you need to earn for both your family and your clinic. I want you to contribute to your family finances if it means that some much needed pressure is taken off of your partner which can improve your relationship and free up more quality time as a couple or a family.

And I want you to really know that if shit hits the fan you will be just fine.